Working Girl

I’m going back to work. Soon. Really soon. Yeesh!

The Australian/British approach of a year-long maternity leave must mean my reticence seems silly to those of you who went back after six weeks. I am so impressed by you women! At six weeks post partum I could barely feed myself, let alone run a meeting.

But I’ve had a year to wear comfortable shoes and questionable hair. Now it’s time to put on my big girl pants and march back into the workforce.

I’m talking a big game here, but the truth is I’m only returning part time. A friend / colleague (frolleague?) of mine and I are entering into the brave world of Job Sharing. Which, in my industry, is about as common as leaving the office at 5.30pm. It’s safe to say we’re flying by the seat of our (big girl) pants.

Setting the logistics of my new role aside, of course what’s weighing heaviest on mind is Little Bun and how this will affect her.

We have a hideous child care shortage around these parts. I have had my name down at three centres since November 2011 (do the math) and I am still ‘six to twelve months’ away from getting a spot. As January turned into February and my polite stalking of these centres elicited no positive response at all, I knew I needed to find an alternative solution. And that was a nanny.

I never imagined we’d be the sort of people who’d have a nanny. I’m not sure who ‘those’ sort of people are, but I figured they sailed boats and wore a lot of white. But I guess they’re normal, like us, and have certain requirements in certain situations that mean a nanny is the go.

Hopefully this is a short to mid term solution until a spot becomes available. And while not the child care route we had planned, I suspect it will make for an easier transition back into the working world.

And me – work! Meetings! Conversations with multiple adults in which babies aren’t referenced at all! Shaking hands! Email at 11pm! Wearing heels! Sitting down for more than five minutes! Lunches out!

I don’t know if I’m ready. Oh BOY my heart is shuddering at the thought of leaving this beautiful baby bubble. I’m going to miss my girl every minute.

But hey, this is life, right? Bring it on.

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3 thoughts on “Working Girl

  1. I honestly believe you are me, from 2-3 months in the future, blogging about what’s to come. My boy is 9 months old and every time your blog comes through, I am either going through/thinking about/anticipating the exact (and I mean exact) topic you blog about.Yp your hair falls out… Mine does too. Your baby sleeps through the night…the next night mine does too. You start chugging down a few glasses of vino in celebration of….. Anything?,…….. I have been doing the same. I’m also now wondering if you also live in Sydney’s inner west??? I must admit I do love a good geezer at the stars (as in astrological) section in the paper each morning, but now I’m starting to feel that your emails are sent to me as a way of showing me what’s about to come!

    Good luck with the return to work. I feel the same way; a simultaneous sense of nervousness, self doubt, and giddy anticipation at life returning (at least somewhat) to ‘normal’. I loved the last line you wrote in this blog, and have repeated it to myself at least 5 times today when I have started to feel overwhelmed by thoughts of ‘how the fu&k am I supposed to go back to work/can I go back to work/should I/etc etc etc…

    Thanks for the blog, I love it.

    T xxx

  2. I was lucky (by American standards) I got to more or less stay home for 6 months after my daughter was born. But regardless of the time, leaving your little one with someone else is hard. I will say though the first day is the worst and it gets better each day. I did have a few set backs when she was sick-ish and I felt guilty leaving her while she didn’t feel well or once in a while when she just looked bigger or was sitting up/crawling/walking better when I picked her up than I remembered her being able to do that morning. But I hope you find a nanny that makes you confortable and going back to work goes smoothly!

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